October 11, 2026
Welcome to our two-part sermon series. Next week we’re talking about what to do when you’re disappointed that God has let you down. Maybe you prayed for something and it didn’t happen. Or you’re in a difficult situation, and you wonder where is God in this? So, this week is about Dealing with Disappointment: When People Let You Down. What do you do when you put your trust in someone and they let you down or hurt you?
When I was in grade school, my best friend was Cindy. We were in school, and in girl scouts together, and we had so much fun! Then we were in junior high school with a lot more students. At some point, Cindy stopped talking to me. I don’t know why. I was really disappointed that I lost her friendship. 30 years later, her mom helped serve at church when my mom died and there was a funeral dinner. Her mom said to me, “You and Cindy had so much fun when you were little!” Yes, we did! It seemed like maybe even her mom couldn’t figure out why we stopped being friends. It makes me sad, but I don’t think I’ll ever know why we stopped being friends!
There are much worse ways that people disappoint us. Some people abuse others. Maybe you trust someone and believe them with all your heart, and they let you down. Or, you marry someone, then they’re unfaithful. Maybe you raise your kids in a certain way, but your children reject that. It’s painful!
When you look at Jesus’ life, he experienced relational letdowns all over the place! Jesus was without sin, but he was called a drunk and a glutton! He was criticized and called a heretic. Some called him demon possessed. Judas, who was a friend of Jesus, Judas, betrayed him. Jesus could’ve gotten revenge on these people because he had the power of God! He could zap them with boils on their body or give them bedbugs. Jesus didn’t. Why do I think of ways Jesus could get back at people? Because I am not sinless! When I have to deal with something like calling social security or the IRS on the phone, I’d like to let loose with what’s wrong with them!
The problem is, when people let us down, we can slip very easily into sinful behavior. We can get a hard heart. You might say, “Forget that; I’m never trusting that person again!” We can feel prideful and say “That person is no good. I would never sink so low as that sinful, pathetic person who deserves to rot where the worm never dies and there’s weeping and gnashing of teeth.” Or we think we’re justified to do something that’s wrong, “My boss isn’t giving me a raise, so I deserve to take something I’m not supposed to home from work.”
The thing is, people are going to let you down, so stop being surprised when they do. It’s important to adjust your expectations. Other than Jesus, every person can at some point let you down. I finally had to let go of the idea that my friend Cindy would suddenly have a change of heart and be my friend. Some things you let go of.
Other times, you need to right-size your expectations. Is there a certain age when a kid is expected to learn to swim, or learn to ride a bike? I think I was late on both. My family didn’t give up on me. They right sized their expectations. They didn’t get stressed that I was late in learning, they didn’t yell at me, and they didn’t give up on me. And I did get there! I learned. I really enjoy swimming and biking now, so I’m glad they didn’t give up. I saw this quote on Pinterest: “Blessed are the flexible, for they won’t get bent out of shape.” When someone disappoints you, if you’re flexible, you won’t get bent out of shape!
When a couple is going to get married here at church, they have to do a premarital questionnaire. And one thing that often trips them up is questions like: “There is nothing my fiancé could do that would make me love them less.” Some people respond, I agree. That’s the wrong answer. Why? Because you’ve got to right size your expectations. You are marrying a human being. Before you get married, your fiancé seems to be so perfect that you believe they can walk on water! But you get married and within a year or so, you will start to be much more aware that they are a human being! You see faults you didn’t see before. And you say, “Wait a minute! I thought I married the perfect person, but I didn’t!” Well, nobody marries the perfect person, because the perfect person doesn’t exist! If you expect to marry the perfect person, you’re out of luck! Better to right size your expectations and go into marriage with the mindset, “My fiancé isn’t perfect, but neither am I. We will have problems, but with the help of God, a counselor, a book on marriage and lots of date nights, we can work through them!” So blessed are the flexible, for they won’t get bent out of shape!
Jesus never said, “Blessed are the flexible,” but he was flexible! He didn’t pick perfect disciples to follow him. He picked people just as they were. He picked doubters like Thomas, tax collectors like Matthew, and people who wanted to be top dog like James and John. He could work with them as they were. Jesus was not thin skinned. He would correct people and rebuke people, but he wouldn’t write them off. Jesus teaches us to be thick skinned and not let people get to us. He said if someone strikes you on the cheek, well, don’t cry, curse or hit back. Instead, he said, “turn the other cheek.” If you go into a town and they don’t receive you kindly, what do you do? Do you yell at them and tell them where they can go? No, you just dust off your feet and move on. You rise above the offense. You get a thicker skin. People will let you down. That’s nothing new.
Jesus said, “I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45 that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.”
How can God ask us to love and pray for people who disappoint us? None of us is without sin, yet Jesus loves and welcomes us all! As God shows love to us, he asks us to be like Him. He asks us to love and pray for people we are angry at. We may not be aware of a difficulty they are going through or a burden they carry. We serve a God who shows us unearned favor and undeserved forgiveness. He asks us to pass it on.
So blest are you when a telemarketer calls. Blest are you when they give you the wrong meal in a restaurant. Blest are you when your mother-in-law tells you what she REALLY thinks about you. It’s a chance to practice being a little like God, showing grace and forgiveness to someone else. It’s a chance to be flexible so you don’t get bent out of shape!
It’s a fact of life that people will disappoint you. It’s really hard when they do, and you need to take care of yourself. But you have the power to respond to that person in a way that God would. Not to take it personally. To pass on the unearned grace and undeserved forgiveness you have received from God.
We’ll close with a short prayer for us to pray together. Please repeat after me. My homework for you is a short prayer for us to pray together. Please repeat after me: Lord give me a thicker skin, and a softer heart! Amen.
