Better is one handful 

August 14, 2022 

My father-in-law was a pastor. When he was in his mid 30s, he had a heart attack and was in the hospital. While in the cardiac recovery unit, he asked his wife to bring his typewriter to the hospital, so he could work on his sermon! Ruth actually brought him his typewriter. The doctor went into Neil’s room to see him, and when he saw him on his typewriter he said, “Neil, you’re going to need to slow down!” Neil did slow down; he went from working 90 hours a week to working 60 hours a week! 

Can you relate to him? It’s hard to rest and take a break! Maybe you feel a double dose of responsibility: you take care of your kids and all their little friends, or you do your job, plus everyone else’s, or you work extra to pay for debts and bills, or you’re a workhorse taking care of your family members. 

Today if you ask someone, “Hey, how are you doing?” the most common answer is, “Well, I’m really busy!” “I’m busy!” “I’m tired.” 

When’s the last time you asked someone, “How are you doing?” and they said, “I’m relaxed! I’ve got free time!” “I’m spending a lot of time with my family and friends, I go on dates every week with my spouse, I’m spending time with God!” 

No, instead you hear, “I’m busy, and tired. Tired and busy!” 

What does God think about this? Jesus said in Matthew 11, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” Does it sound like God wants you to be tired and busy all the time? No, he will give you rest. Maybe you know God wants to give you rest, but you don’t know how you could ever actually rest? 

Today we’ll hear some wisdom from the book of Ecclesiastes, and some from the apostle Paul, to help us slow down and enjoy the life God has given us. 

Eccl. 4:4 says, “And I saw that all toil and all achievement spring from one person’s envy of another. This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind.” 

You may think envy started with social media, or when we started seeing the lifestyles of the rich and famous on TV and the internet. But 2500 years ago, when the book of Ecclesiastes was written, people were comparing themselves to others and getting jealous. Now, if you are trying to keep up with the Joneses, there is no point. My next-door neighbors really are the Joneses! Their last name is Jones. And right now they are getting a new kitchen put in, while their son just bought a boat! They are great people, I love them. I wasn’t craving them before, but now I would like a boat and a kitchen makeover! 

We look around and compare ourselves to others. There’s always somebody who has more than you: they’re richer or skinnier or smarter or taller or prettier or happier or cooler or they’ve got a better marriage er. Their kids are taller or more athletic. Their pets behave better. They have a better job.  

And sometimes we like to look around and feel that there are people less than us: well they’re heavier than me, shorter than me, or they’ve got a worser marriage.  

But there’s no win in comparison. Eccl. 4:4 says, all this comparison and envy is meaningless. It’s a chasing after the wind. It leads to trouble. It can lead to debt, because you spend so much time staring at somebody else’s lifestyle, that you go buy the boat and spend money you don’t have on your kitchen makeover! 

Sometimes we compare our family members to others, and it can drive us crazy: I wish my spouse had a better job, I wish my kids were like my neighbor’s kids. But if you actually tell your family members out loud, “why can’t you be like so and so?” That’s an insult and can drive them crazy. It’s more like a tornado touching down in your family than chasing after the wind! 

So, Ecclesiastes warns us that envying someone else is meaninglessness. Comparing doesn’t help. 

Does that mean you just shouldn’t care about anything? Don’t set goals, don’t work to achieve anything? No, because verse 5 says, “Fools fold their hands and ruin themselves.” In other words, don’t be a fool and just give up! The writer of Ecclesiastes says, don’t envy others, but on the other hand, don’t give up on your goals or stop trying to do anything.  

The first no-no is envy and comparing, the second no-no is just not caring about anything. Is there another way? 

Yes, it comes in verse 6: “Better one handful with tranquility than two handfuls with toil and chasing after the wind.” 

That means, less is better. Do less, buy less. Reach for just one handful of stuff, not two. One handful living means you love you just the way you are and you love your family and friends exactly as they are. It means don’t be an overfunctioner. An overfunctioner means you take care of yourself, and everybody else. You do your kid’s homework. Don’t do that! Step back and let them do it. Some parents overfunction because they don’t trust their kids can do it on their own. But the best teacher there is is when you make a mistake. That’s the best way we learn. We don’t learn when someone takes over over job for us. So instead of saying, “Let me do this for you,” it’s better to let them do it. Then if they mess up ask, “What did you learn from this?” That’s all. No lectures. They’ll figure it out.  

One handful living also means you no longer act like you are a superhero. Instead you get plenty of sleep, take breaks, and ask for help when you need it. The world will keep spinning when you rest. 

The apostle Paul teaches us a little more about “one handful” living. He says in Philippians 4:11-12, “I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. ¹² I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. ¹³ I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” 

Paul says he learned the secret to being content whatever the circumstances. The secret is he leans on the strength of God. Notice, Paul does not say he was born content. He says he learned to be content. You and I can learn to be content, to live reaching for just one handful instead of two. We can ask God for the strength to slow down, to let go, and to find things to celebrate and appreciate, even if, like Paul, we’re shipwrecked or in prison. One handful living means you let God fill you up. 

I used to enjoy running as a hobby, until a couple years ago I had an injury, I think it’s a torn meniscus. So now I ride my bike or walk for exercise instead of running. I would rather run than walk. Walking is slower. But I have learned to be content walking! I walk on trails. I start to notice the tall trees; I didn’t slow down enough to notice them before. I tell the trees I’m sorry when they have fallen over and died on the path. I eat the raspberries and mulberries. I see the berries on the bushes more because I’m going slower, not running past them. I enjoy the wildflowers more because I walk. God has helped me to be content walking! One handful living means you let God fill you up. 

My homework for you this week, is to ask yourself, what do I need to let go of so I can accept my life as it is and let myself rest? How do I rely more on God and his strength to be content? 

We live in a busy world, and too often we give in to a faster pace and a desire for more. But if we’re just tired and busy, are we living the life we want to live? Better is one handful with tranquility. Better is being able to say, I’m enjoying life, I’m happy with the people I love. I’m happy with myself. Happiness does not come from having everything you want. Ask God for his strength to find contentment and tranquility in every situation. Amen.